Nobody grows up saying “I want to become a nonprofit founder when I’m older.” Not even the people who eventually do.
Do you think young people who are just starting out in life, building their finances, in their roaring 20s should devote themselves to helping others and building NGOs? Or Nepo babies only?
This month at Kryvent, we’ve been talking about money, how it shapes the nonprofit journey, how founders earn it, spend it, and sometimes give up comfort for it. But we wanted to go beyond the surface. I spoke to the people who knew these founders beyond their social bios; Their parents, siblings, and partners.
We’re beginning with the parents. The ones who have quietly invested their time, money, care, and dreams into the lives of these founders.
Can we meet you, ma?
My name is Mrs. Ude Azibanyamaman. I’m the Chief Catering Officer with the Bayelsa State Civil Service. I’ve been working as a caterer for 26 years, but over time, I found myself leaning more towards writing, speaking, and counseling people. These days, I spend more time on budgets and meal planning, so you could say I’m more of an administrator.
When Ugo was younger, did you have any dreams or aspirations for what you hoped she would become?
No, I never had a specific dream or aspiration for her. Ugo attended a good school, New Total Child Academy (NTCA). It is one that gives parents peace of mind about what their kids might become. But I know Ugo says I’m too dramatic and that I stress her out. For example, I once told her she must never join the Nigerian army. She’s too bold and daring. She could even ask to be posted somewhere death is.
She loves justice too much, so I also told her not to become a lawyer. She would be the kind of lawyer who goes out of her way to challenge the powerful and fight for the innocent. Becoming a police officer was out of it too. She’s outspoken and would end up creating enemies for herself.
Do you remember how you felt when she first said she wanted to become an activist?
It wasn’t a conversation. Ugo didn’t say, “Mom, I want to become an activist.” But everything she did, even down to her education, showed that she was one. I call her “Activist.” Everything about her said it.
I didn’t even know there were different types of activism. I thought it was only about fighting the government and speaking out about what they were not doing. So yes, Ugo and I have had arguments about activism. I remember telling her once that I would kill myself before they killed her for me.
She once wrote a piece about the then governor of Bayelsa State, Honourable Henry Seriake Dickson, who demolished a market. I didn’t know until my colleagues asked me if I saw what my daughter wrote. We also argued over a famous pastor who had a scandal, even over #EndSARS. Ugo always wants to write, to speak up, to lend her voice. I would call her, pleading with her not to protest or post anything.
Then there’s the book drive. Ugo would go out of her way to donate books. She started with her little cousin, buying only books for her birthday every year. She finds a way to make education easier and more comfortable for people. I didn’t know that was activism or even educational activism.
When Ugo experiences something, she immediately wants to fix it for the people coming behind her. Like when she settled into Unilag in her first year. She started volunteering to help other first year students. I used to worry a lot about the kind of activism that involved calling people out or writing on social media. But seeing her other forms of activism helped me find peace.
Did you ever imagine she would stay with education activism this long?
It’s like asking me if Ugo will breathe as she got older. Ugo’s life is educational activism. Whether she graduates, becomes a professor, or chooses another path, she will still desire, insist, and find ways for people to take education seriously and mentor others. She will continue to push for excellence in the Nigerian education system.
What are the things you admire most about the work Ugo does, and what, if anything, still worries you?
There are so many things I admire about what she does. The one that stands out the most is her strong belief that students should have access to school-provided books and a good environment to study in, like a proper library. She had both at NTCA, the school she attended. Now she’s doing everything she can to make sure the few she can reach have access to books and actually read them. I love that about her. She’s the same way with her siblings and their reading culture.
Before she started working on building a library, she began the book drive in Bayelsa and later extended it to two other states. Even when she was in Lagos, she made sure the Bayelsa book drive continued. Eventually, she partnered with a Youth Corper to open a library in a school. If Ugo had all the resources she needed, she would do so well with education and children from low-income families.
Ugo also practices disability activism. It gives me so much joy to know that her younger sister, who is autistic, is safe and seen.
I also admire how seriously she takes her education and how she pushes others to do the same. Her level of academic excellence is truly wonderful. If you give my Ugo a five-by-seven metre space and ask her to put only three things in it, she’ll pick a table and two chairs. She’ll use one side to eat and the other to study. Ugo is good. She might just need a toilet.
How do you personally define success for Ugo, especially in the context of her nonprofit work?
To see a child or children who didn’t have access to good libraries or books get one. Or the one without an enabling environment to study. With the book drive, Ugo didn’t get to see the children that received books from us, especially when she went to Lagos. We saw the children and their guardians. But when she gets information from us that a child has received the books, you can see the joy she expresses.
Success for her is when someone finally gets the books they need and an enabling learning environment.
Do you ever worry about her financial stability or feel she gives too much of herself while helping others?
I know she gives so much to help, but I’m not worried about it. Ugo knows I could be worse than her when it comes to giving and helping. I also know Ugo is living out my dream. When I was younger, I dreamed of owning comfort homes where I could feed and raise children, not orphans, but those whose parents couldn’t afford basic things like a bed or an education.
Back to the question:
Ugo could be saving up and need an item. She might worry that her money will run out if she buys it. I can tell her I’ll give her the money for it. But if Ugo sees someone with the same need, she will use her savings for that person. So I’m not bothered. Ugo finds joy in meeting other people’s needs.
If someone gave you ₦10 million to support Ugo’s activism work or redirect her path, which would you choose, and why?
I would support education activism. Ugo’s education reassures me that she would do well even if myself and her dad were no longer around. At 13, she was already writing poetry. She used to represent her school in competitions. Ugo developed skills through her education. She would have been able to survive through her skills and schooling, and succeed, like she does now. Ugo is empowered to earn and stand up for herself.
Her brother, for example, liked to draw from a young age. He would request my photographs in primary school to draw me. The school noticed these drawing abilities and although they don’t employ undergraduates, before he finished secondary school, he was employed to teach art to primary school pupils. He makes money through his art. Like his sister, he’s self-sufficient. He is empowered because of a good school.
Supporting Ugo means many more people can take education seriously, get a good education, and learn in a conducive environment. They can come out useful for themselves. I would support her so that more people can go to school and become living proof that they’re educated.
In addition
I would also support her with disability activism. I see how she feels when persons with disabilities are treated badly. When negative words are used on them. Instead of calling them by name, people refer to them as “these people.” Ugo attends every event on autism, Down syndrome, and other forms of disability. She’s happy when she visits buildings or hotels that prepare for persons with disabilities. When she returns, she talks about it excitedly.
If I invest in it, it will help her see that success has been empowered.
We’ve come to the end. Please leave a message for Ugo.
Dear Ugo,
I no longer regret that I didn’t go to school or abandon my dreams to raise you. I used to. But now, I’m happy that I raised someone who is living out my dreams without me asking or paying you to do so. When I look at you, I thank God.
Two things come from impacting lives. The reward from helping others goes beyond money, property, or social status.
The impact lives in the heart of people.
Fame doesn’t mean the entire nation or world knows your name. It means there’s a world around the person whose life you’ve touched, and people’s hearts testify. That is you, Ugo. I thank God that you are my daughter, living such a life.
If Jesus allows us to come back to this world, I will choose you again and again to be my daughter. I will want to be your mother again and again.
Thank you for being my Ugo.
Can we meet you, ma?
My name is Esther Adebiyi. I am an entrepreneur. The founder of Natures Exotic Limited, a nature based snacks company.
How would you describe what your child does for a living, including her nonprofit work?
Abiola is an Investigative and Forensic Accountant, A Management Consultant, A Social and Visionary “Impacter” who is passionate about the total wellbeing of teenagers especially in less privileged communities.
Abiola started working in the nonprofit sector as a teenager. What were your first thoughts when she mentioned this to you?
My first thought was to support her 100%. I didn’t have any negative feelings about it at all. In fact, I even looked for someone who lived in Makoko and could take us there for her very first visit.
At the beginning, when she discovered this passion to make an impact in Makoko, I made sure I was always going with her. That’s one thing about me, I always listen to my children, support their dreams, and encourage them every step of the way.
At that time, did you think she would pursue this path for the long term?
Yes, I did. I was always looking forward to Christmas in Makoko, but more importantly, it was the zeal and passion she showed from the very beginning that made me know this was something big. Then the idea of registering the name ElevateNG came up, and that confirmed it even more for me.
What are the things you most admire about what Abiola does, and what, if anything, still worries you about it?
She is so passionate about making sure that teenagers in less privileged communities are educated. I also admire her love for God, her dedication to her job, and her commitment to her foundation. She’s so deeply involved in all of this that she hardly finds time to take care of herself.
How do you feel about supporting the work at Elevate Development Foundation?
I have always supported the work at ElevateNG, and I will continue to support her.
How do you define success for Abiola, especially in the context of her nonprofit work?
Success for Abiola is doing the will of God, even in the way she runs her foundation. It’s seeing the young people she mentors graduate from university. It’s seeing them become better versions of themselves through the ElevateNG mentoring programme. She is fulfilling destiny, changing lives, and leading people to Christ.
Do you have any advice for young people working in the social development space, like Abiola?
Determination is very key. Also, believe that you can move mountains. Trust in the Lord and commit all your plans to Him. Never look back, just keep going and believe that you can change the world.
Thank you so much, ma. Please leave a message for Abiola.
Dear Daughter,
I am blessed to be your mum.
I love the way you love the Lord and the passion you have for young adults.
You are content, and I always thank God for what you have become and for all you will still become.
All that the Lord has laid on your heart to do, you will receive strength from above to accomplish them.
I love you.
Your mum.
Can we meet you, sir?
Sure. My name is Adeyinka Adewale Olatona. I’m married to Adeyinka Elizabeth Ayomide, and I work as a Medical Laboratory Technician at LUTH, Idi-Araba.
When Erioluwa was younger, did you have any dreams or expectations for what he might become?
Honestly, I thought he’d become a medical doctor or at least find a path somewhere in the medical field. But God had something better in mind.
What was your first reaction when he told you he wanted to work in development and the nonprofit space?
It didn’t come as a shock at all. Erioluwa has always been selfless and deeply compassionate. From a young age, he enjoyed community service and was always taking the initiative to help others. So when he shared his plans to work in development, I was not surprised at all because it has always been his comfort area.
Did you see it as a phase, or did it feel like something he’d stick with long-term?
Hmmm, he’s passionate about human development and capacity building, and I believe he’ll keep doing this for as long as God leads him. That said, he’s also a dynamic person, who can flow into any other commerce of his interest when occasion arises.
He’s visited several countries and even hosted conferences. What do you think of the work he’s doing now?
I’m neutral. This is not because I’m not proud, but because I believe Erioluwa knows his passion, and he knows what works best for him. I support him fully in that.
Do you ever worry about finances or where this path might take him in the long run?
Not at all. We’re a praying family, and we’ve handed all our fears and hopes to Jesus. The scriptures remind us not to worry about tomorrow, because tomorrow will take care of itself. So no worries.
When people ask, “What does your child do?” Do you feel proud, uncertain, or find it difficult to explain?
Honestly, we are very proud of the impact he has been making. And his works are quite verifiable and for references.
If someone offered you ₦10 million, and you had to either use it to support his nonprofit work or redirect his path entirely, which would you choose, and why?
I’d use it to support his nonprofit work. He has always earned my support, and that won’t change. I believe in what he’s doing.
Thank you, sir. Before we close, please leave Erioluwa a message.
Dear Erioluwa,
I’m incredibly proud of the person you’ve become and the impact you’re making in the world. Your passion for community service, human development, and capacity building is truly inspiring. I believe in you and your abilities, and I’m grateful to God for your commitment to making a difference.
Keep following your heart, and continue to do all things with the fear of God. Your family will always be here cheering you on. I’m excited to see the amazing things you’ll achieve in the future.
With all my love and support,
Daddy
Lover & Past Partner
Can we meet you?
Meet as how? I dey my house.
Jokes aside, I’m Enoch. A medical doctor and photographer.
What does your partner do in the nonprofit space?
She’s worked with several nonprofits, managing different projects. Her most recent role is in partnerships. She’s also the founder of a media and data company focused on the nonprofit sector.
What was your first reaction when you found out she works with nonprofits?
Honestly, I was kind of indifferent. No dramatic reaction, I can’t even remember exactly how I felt.
What do you admire most about her work , and what concerns you, if any?
I admire the dedication and selflessness it takes to genuinely want to make an impact and help build a better world.
If I do have any concern, it’s whether she’ll always be adequately appreciated and fairly paid for her skills and talent.
Do you have any fears about her financial or career stability?
Not really. She’s a trust fund babe, so no shaking.
Editor’s Note: Misinformation alert. Feyi commented that she does not have a trust fund. She in fact craves one.
But seriously, I think there are people doing very well in the space. She’s good at what she does and I believe she’ll stand out.
Do you ever worry about having to constantly support her work financially?
Nope. I’m committed to supporting her work, as long as it doesn’t put a strain on our future family.
What would your reaction be if she decided to work full-time in the nonprofit sector?
If she’s getting paid well or finds fulfillment in it, then no wahala at all.
Any advice for your partner?
Dear Feyi,
You’re doing a great job, and I’m so proud of you.
Don’t be scared to ask for your worth. People earn in your field.
Past Partner
Anonymity was requested by both parties.
In your past relationship with this nonprofit founder, did you have any financial concerns or fears?
Not at all. I trusted her financial sense, she actually helped structure my own finances. I had zero concerns in that regard.
Do you think she invested more (time and resources) in her social impact work than the relationship?
She definitely gave a lot of time to her work, which I encouraged. I wouldn’t say it negatively impacted the relationship, but I did remind her often to take care of herself, she carried a lot. I always believed in the value her social impact work was doing so it didn’t cause the relationship harm.
Did you ever feel pressured or worry about financial obligations towards her nonprofit work?
Not at all. I supported it joyfully because I knew how much it meant to her and the difference it made for others. I never felt any pressure, and even now, I still support her work and plan to do more as I grow financially.
Do you think your parents or loved ones would have been worried about a partner who did nonprofit work full time?
Quite the opposite. My parents didn’t have a problem with it, infact, that was one of the first things I told them about her. They’re also into social impact, so it really resonated.
Did any aspect of their work affect or contribute to your breakup?
No, not really.
Would you date someone in the nonprofit sector again?
I wouldn’t mind. It would really depend on how they balance their passion with family life. It’s not a dealbreaker or something I actively seek, but it’s also not something I’d avoid.
The Siblings
Sister
Can we meet you?
My name is Jones Oluwapelumi. I’m a virtual assistant and project manager.
Is the founder your older or younger sibling?
She’s my older sister.
How would you describe what your sister does for a living, in your own words?
I’d say she saves women, but that might be a reach! She’s a project manager, a social media manager, and runs an NGO called 4Herfrika.
Do you ever wonder if she’s sacrificing her own stability to create stability for others?
Yes, to some extent. Ademide deeply cares about people, especially young people. She sacrifices a lot of her time, and often her own money, to keep her nonprofit running. Running an NGO in Nigeria is tough, and I know how it sometimes takes a toll on her.
How do you think your parents perceive her career choice—now vs. when she started?
Our parents have always been supportive. From the beginning, they helped with the legal aspects of setting up her nonprofit.
What do you admire the most about the work your sister does?
Her selflessness. I always tell her she’s my inspiration. She motivates me to aim higher, to be better. She’s the selfless version of me. Her life shows me that no door is truly out of reach.
Please leave your sister a message.
Dear Ademide,
I love you so much. You inspire me and make me feel like I can do great things too. Don’t stop being the amazing, selfless woman that you are. Keep knocking on doors, I know they’ll open.
Brother
Can we meet you?
Hi, my name is Joshua Olaoye Oyedeji.
Is the founder your older or younger sister?
My younger sister.
How would you describe the work your sister does with her nonprofit?
Her work with TeenCode is really bearing fruit. More teens are learning about life and how to navigate it.
If she decided to focus fully on building TeenCode, what concerns would you have? And how do you think your parents would respond?
I’d fully support her. I believe our parents would respond positively too.
Have you ever donated to support her nonprofit?
Yes, I have.
What do you admire most about her work?
I like that she brings teens together and mentors them on real life issues.
Please leave your sister a message.
Dear Dorcas,
I see the work you’re doing with teens, and I wish I had someone like you when I was their age.
Keep doing what you do best, you’ll see the reward of your hard work in the lives of the young people you’ve nurtured.
Whew! That was a lot.
If you made it to this point, na reader you be.
If you were considering going into the nonprofit space, maybe your parents won’t disown you after all, as you’ve seen above. Or maybe they still will. Who knows?
On a serious note, when I announced that I was going to write this piece, there was a lot of anticipation. And yes, some bias too. A lot of bias, including mine, that parents would have plenty to say about their fears or dissatisfaction.
Clearly, times are changing. A big thank you to every parent and participant who said yes.
Now, where are the married folks? I couldn’t seem to convince anyone with a ring to join this round of interviews.
I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. Share your thoughts with us in the comments or join the conversation on Twitter and Instagram.
